The Floor is LAVA!!!!

Ok folks— some of you may judge me for this, but my unofficial Facebook survey says I’m in the majority on this one. Netflix’s “The Floor is Lava” is officially my new escape.

It is totally ridiculous, contestants hamming it up trying to cross an obstacle course until they eventually successfully get to the end, or sadly, meet their demise in said lava.

Teams compete against each other to see how many of their team members can successfully get across and how long it takes them.

Sometimes they all make it across, sometimes none — and the teams are made of of 2-3 friends, usually linked by some common element. (college buddies, workout pals, co-workers, siblings, etc.)

By now you are wondering why I’m giving you a run down of the show. I’m an HR professional, not an entertainment reporter. Truth. Stay with me!

So Q (my 8 year old) and I were bingeing our 4th episode of the night, watching three teams trying to traverse the lava in the Planetarium. (BTW- all of the rooms have themes)

Team #1 - Three Beantown buddies (“the Bostonians”)— a young, trash talking bunch and invoking Tom Brady’s greatness to propel them through. I thought they had a shot.

Team #2 - A trio of middle-aged siblings (“the Siblings”) who looked fairly suburban (I’m sorry suburban friends!)— and their fun fact was that in their family- they had 36 grandkids. 36. That is a lot of epidurals.

Two of them had 12 in kids between them total (6 each), with the youngest brother with none. Pretty sure he’ll get them to the big 4-0 once he starts to procreate. I thought:

They are never going to make it. I mean— they don’t look athletic, and that woman has had 6 kids, I’m sure her core muscles are shot. Not gonna happen.

Team #3 - Dubbed the Tri Force Heroes — they were a group of 3 black women gamers, lovers of Zelda— super fit, lanky— with long limbs that I was sure would come in handy for the course.

I don’t want to spoil it for you, but I kind of have to so I can get to the end game.

Guess who won?

(dramatic pause)

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Of course, the Siblings— the ones I thought would bite the dust earliest — prevailed and captured the lava lamp trophy.

Their adversaries took the course and tried to brute force their way through. They relied primarily on physical strength and agility to help them maneuver through the course independently.

The Siblings, however, stayed pretty close to one another on the course. They tested the stability of objects before they jumped. The used each other as backstops so they wouldn’t go flying off the end of moon rock. They steadied the sputnik-satellite thingy so another could walk on it safely. They spoke words of encouragement (“I love you”) — and I was literally like, is this the time to get sentimental??? You’re gonna drop in the lava!

Ultimately, their brains, strategy and teamwork guided the two brothers across. While the sister came up just short— there was no doubt her brothers would have made it across without her. #teamworkmakesthedreamwork

Which brings me to the moral of the this week’s blog: Unconscious Bias

A good friend last week thought I should write about unconscious bias— and I hesitated— I didn’t feel like I could author something compelling enough. But after watching this episode and I realized that I could make the concept more accessible to those who don’t quite understand it or are afraid of it.

Accessibility is an important part of the education process, because not everyone has the benefit of learning or observing what it is. Sometimes, you need the examples and analogies, for concepts to make sense.

I checked my bias and it was ALL OVER THE PLACE. See below.

"They look more fit”

“They are middle aged suburbanites”

“They are young and limber and are probably better athletes”

“She’s a mom to 6 kids, there is no way she can leap those rocks”

#SMH

Unconscious bias is bias that permeates the way you think, judge certain people and situations. They are stereotypes we employ all day, every day.

I have it.

You have it.

We all do.

And while this is a benign example— it is a reminder to me (and hopefully for you)— that you need to check your bias, because if it creeps in while you’re watching a TV show— then what do you think it’s doing when you go to work?

At the end— I should’ve known better than to second guess a mom of 6. If she can do that— she can do ANYTHING.

Including conquering the lava.

Would love to hear how you’re checking your bias… let me know!

Be Well, Stay well.

Jean

PS - apparently the creators went through 50 iterations of the lava formula to get it just the right lava-ness.

Congrats to the Sibs!

A Tale of Two Cities? Try 77.

A couple of days ago, I shared some pictures of my beloved Chicago, more specifically, my neighborhood, Bucktown.

Things have been calmer the last 48 hours in Bucktown, but the difference between rest and unrest can be a fine line in a city. I took my first walk around since the weekend, and I saw a lot of pain, remnants of destruction, countless tributes to George Floyd and others who have lost their lives, but also beauty, hope and helpers.

They say Chicago is a tale of two cities— North and South, but it is really 77 cities woven into one.

I still hold my breath when I hear of a protest, hoping it won’t turn violent and that cooler heads will prevail. The only thing I can hope for is progress. Incremental steps forward everyday.

I know a lot of organizations are looking for answers, actions, a new playbook. It’s ok not to have one just yet- the commitment to change and to do something different is more important right now. The issues of systemic racism and bias have been so deeply entrenched for centuries- fight to urge to “fix”.

Declare your intent.

Then look, listen and learn.

Sharing some new pictures — some might see spray paint and boards. I saw inspiration and hope.

Be well & stay well,

J

36 hours in Bucktown, Chicago

No words, just pictures.

Seriously.

I read this article from Thrive Global this morning and I started cracking up.

I wasn’t laughing at the article— which is very good, and you should read it (!)- but because it reminded me of an experience with a leader I will never forget…

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Years ago, I worked with this leader who was very smart , but very controlling.

He made the business a lot of money, but there were always questions about his leadership style. He created this weird vibe/ culture; at times I almost felt like his team was brainwashed. I always got politically correct answers, but something always felt…off.

If you weren’t with him, you were definitely against him. And because I might offered up a different idea, an alternate solution, or didn’t fall over myself to salute— by default, I was not on the right side of that line. But I really enjoyed his team—- they were very talented and a great group, so I kept trying to form as many meaningful relationships I could.

I always hesitated before I picked up one of his calls— just so I could mentally prepare myself for the onslaught. BTW- I’m sure he also hesitated before he called me. #becausemutualfeelings

We were catching up one day and I mentioned that I would be heading to Japan to visit the office there. I was going with another client I supported and I offered to meet with some of his team to capitalize on my time there.

Then— it started happening…

He started educating me on Japanese business etiquette. #forreal

“You have to greet people with a bow.”

“Do you know where to sit at the table?”

“Do you know you have to bring a gift.“

And so on….

Just a reminder, this is what I look like below. Also a couple of facts about me.

• My last name is Suzuki.

• I am Japanese American. 2nd Generation.

• My parents were born in Japan.

• I speak Japanese.

I stared at the phone and tried to figure out what to say.

Finally, I say,

“You know, Bill*, I’m actually Japanese. So, I’m familiar with the customs there.”

*not his real name

He stopped.

We ended the call shortly thereafter.

And I was like, “wow, that just happened.”

The perfect Jeopardy ThingsThatDidntHappen Animated GIF for your conversation. Discover and Share the best GIFs on Tenor.

Let me be clear— when I think about the brief exchange, I just laugh because it was so utterly ridiculous.

The other thing I remember thinking is … why does he have this insane need to always be the smartest in the room?

He needed to be so right… ALL the time— that he tried to out-Japanese the Japanese woman. (is that even a thing??)

It’s not a competition folks. If you’re type-A, sometimes it’s hard to bring people along with you, but I promise if you do, you will learn and be all the better for it. Hire people who compliment your skills and knowledge. Seek out those who will constructively challenge. You will raise the collective bar.

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For those in the US, enjoy your long holiday weekend! If I’m being honest, I just realized that Monday is Memorial Day.

To our Veterans, thank you for what you have given for our country.

Be safe & stay well,

Jean

Remember when...

Remember when we were talking about open workspaces, kombucha on tap and free employee meals?

Remember when we thought it would keep employees engaged and foster a more contemporary culture?

Remember when we thought collaboration was all about being together in the same space? …so you could have impromptu hallway meetings and solve the world’s problems?

I do, kind of.

But that is in the rearview mirror.

Here is what I remember.

• I remember in the beginning of March, we thought … it’s just 2 weeks.

• I remember when we got to Spring Break— and all parents took a collective sigh of relief when they could take a break from homeschooling.

• I remember when it was finally April… but it still wasn’t an April Fools Joke.

• I remember when I learned I had friends battling Covid.

• I remember when I found out via Facebook that my old manager lost her mother to Covid.

• I remember driving around looking for clorox wipes, but since there were none to be found, I bought ice cream instead.

• I remember getting a text from another HR friend who had her first employee pass away.

• I remember the wedding my friend had to postpone; and the babies that have been born that I haven’t been able to visit and shower with hugs and gifts.

• I remember my friends celebrating their 1-year-old’s birthday on zoom; I am now planning for my own baby’s June socially distanced birthday.

The world has changed and will keep shifting beneath our feet. It’s unsettling.

The culture you have cultivated as a leader will determine how your organization emerges from this.

NOW is the time to double down on TRUST and TRANSPARENCY.

Here’s how.

• You hired people for a reason … let them do their jobs.

• Listen more than you speak. Ask questions.

• Get comfortable with making decisions with imperfect data. It is ok to admit that.

• Ask for help, so you inherently give others permission to do the same.

• Understand what people are afraid of. (yes, where there is anger/ frustration, there is usually fear of something) If you don’t know, you can’t help.

• You need to tell people what you are afraid of — not to spark panic, but to share in the experience of vulnerability with your team.

Finally, you have to be honest with yourself. If this trust & transparency thing runs counter to how you have always operated— then let this day be a new day.

Let people know that you’re ready to move forward and be a different kind of leader.

And did I mention — don’t forget to ask for help.

Be safe and stay well,

Jean

Permission Granted: Take a Break Tuesday.

I saw this the other day on Instagram and I reposted on my personal page because it resonated with me.

Evidently, it resonated with many of you because I got tons of reactions from friends. It’s a really simple graphic… it’s really about balance (which is not a new concept), but why is it so helpful to see it right now?

Here’s my theory.

There is no doubt that we are in big time Groundhog Day-mode. We are all Bill Murray. #everysingleday

Groundhog Day - 1993

There’s not a whole lot of variety going on in our days.

Whether you are a first responder, a checkout person, WFH remotely, AND trying to homeschool, cook, clean and keep things somewhat “normal” for your kids— we’re all pretty laser focused these days, living in the moment. People have different coping mechanisms, and for some— putting the head down and work, work, work is the way to get through it. #washrinserepeat

But inevitably, your mind wanders off as to what COULD be once the stay at home orders are lifted. We long for the days we can go outside without face coverings, hug our loved ones, and meet friends for a drink. It almost feels a little bit indulgent to think about it, if I’m being honest.

For me, everything feels like it take a bit more effort. Like I’m giving 150%, but my output feels much lower. I need one of those stars in Super Mario that pops out of the block. You know, the one that makes you invincible for like 10 seconds and you can run through everything.

But this is our collective reality— there is no magic star, and grinding every day, without taking those conscious breaks is mentally grueling. Maybe you typically take a couple days off in the spring for a vacation…

…and maybe you didn’t this year because you’d rather “save it” for when we can do things and go places.

…maybe you didn’t take it because you wanted to keep some normalcy or a routine.

…maybe you didn’t take the time because you’re worried about your job; the fear around layoffs and furloughs are real.

Here’s the thing though— you can’t work yourself into the ground OR out of our current Covid reality. You have to take a break.

You have to take a brain break.

Do you know what happens to muscles you never relax? They don’t get stronger— in fact, your body adapts in a way to compensate for the fact you’re not resting and something else will be compromised (thank you, physical therapist friends)

Work MAY keep you busy and occupied, but like all trauma (I classify this whole experience as trauma, BTW), at some point— you need to process it.

In the event of layoff/ furlough, the emotional processing becomes exponentially important— because it’s hard to do start your next professional chapter if you haven’t resolved the prior one.

In my career, I’ve interviewed many people who have been affected by job loss, in different economic cycles (post 9-11, financial crisis, divestitures) and across various industries (media, financial services, real estate).

I can always tell the candidates who have made “peace” with their job loss— they typically interview well; are confident and are successful.

Conversely, I’ve interviewed those who had not or did not take the time and/ or steps to understand what they just went through — and it always shows up during the conversation.

The energy is different. The words feel heavier.

There is a bitterness.

And that intangible feeling of , “do I want to work with this person every day??

It’s not there.

Everyone processes things in different ways and at varying speeds, but I do know one thing for sure— you will be more resilient and have better perspective if you will have practiced some semblance of balance along the way.

When people ask me, “What do I do if I’ve been laid off?”

My answer? Take a little time*. Get right with yourself, formulate your your plan, and execute it.

*NB: I know that sounds a lot easier than it is.

When people ask me, “how do you know when you’re ready to start looking? Is there a sign?”

My answer — yes, and it honestly looks and feels a little bit like dating. Sometimes you break up with someone, sometimes you get your heart broken— either way, there comes a day where you know you’ve let it go and you’re ready to move forward.

Finally, if you are offered any assistance in the form of outplacement services… USE IT.

Outplacement is a benefit that many companies are cutting back on for cost purposes, if they offer it at all. But if you can access outplacement services as a part of your job loss— make the call. Log onto that webinar.

You don’t have to go right away, but MAKE THE CALL as soon as you think you can.

Why???

Even if you think it is dumb and you think the services aren’t effective — you are taking an action. You are taking the first step forward—maybe the hardest and important step in the process.

To acknowledge that you’re open to help; it is a brave and courageous step.

And that is to be celebrated.

THAT is productivity.

You’re ready to start dating.

Be well & stay well,

Jean