Remember when...

Remember when we were talking about open workspaces, kombucha on tap and free employee meals?

Remember when we thought it would keep employees engaged and foster a more contemporary culture?

Remember when we thought collaboration was all about being together in the same space? …so you could have impromptu hallway meetings and solve the world’s problems?

I do, kind of.

But that is in the rearview mirror.

Here is what I remember.

• I remember in the beginning of March, we thought … it’s just 2 weeks.

• I remember when we got to Spring Break— and all parents took a collective sigh of relief when they could take a break from homeschooling.

• I remember when it was finally April… but it still wasn’t an April Fools Joke.

• I remember when I learned I had friends battling Covid.

• I remember when I found out via Facebook that my old manager lost her mother to Covid.

• I remember driving around looking for clorox wipes, but since there were none to be found, I bought ice cream instead.

• I remember getting a text from another HR friend who had her first employee pass away.

• I remember the wedding my friend had to postpone; and the babies that have been born that I haven’t been able to visit and shower with hugs and gifts.

• I remember my friends celebrating their 1-year-old’s birthday on zoom; I am now planning for my own baby’s June socially distanced birthday.

The world has changed and will keep shifting beneath our feet. It’s unsettling.

The culture you have cultivated as a leader will determine how your organization emerges from this.

NOW is the time to double down on TRUST and TRANSPARENCY.

Here’s how.

• You hired people for a reason … let them do their jobs.

• Listen more than you speak. Ask questions.

• Get comfortable with making decisions with imperfect data. It is ok to admit that.

• Ask for help, so you inherently give others permission to do the same.

• Understand what people are afraid of. (yes, where there is anger/ frustration, there is usually fear of something) If you don’t know, you can’t help.

• You need to tell people what you are afraid of — not to spark panic, but to share in the experience of vulnerability with your team.

Finally, you have to be honest with yourself. If this trust & transparency thing runs counter to how you have always operated— then let this day be a new day.

Let people know that you’re ready to move forward and be a different kind of leader.

And did I mention — don’t forget to ask for help.

Be safe and stay well,

Jean

Permission Granted: Take a Break Tuesday.

I saw this the other day on Instagram and I reposted on my personal page because it resonated with me.

Evidently, it resonated with many of you because I got tons of reactions from friends. It’s a really simple graphic… it’s really about balance (which is not a new concept), but why is it so helpful to see it right now?

Here’s my theory.

There is no doubt that we are in big time Groundhog Day-mode. We are all Bill Murray. #everysingleday

Groundhog Day - 1993

There’s not a whole lot of variety going on in our days.

Whether you are a first responder, a checkout person, WFH remotely, AND trying to homeschool, cook, clean and keep things somewhat “normal” for your kids— we’re all pretty laser focused these days, living in the moment. People have different coping mechanisms, and for some— putting the head down and work, work, work is the way to get through it. #washrinserepeat

But inevitably, your mind wanders off as to what COULD be once the stay at home orders are lifted. We long for the days we can go outside without face coverings, hug our loved ones, and meet friends for a drink. It almost feels a little bit indulgent to think about it, if I’m being honest.

For me, everything feels like it take a bit more effort. Like I’m giving 150%, but my output feels much lower. I need one of those stars in Super Mario that pops out of the block. You know, the one that makes you invincible for like 10 seconds and you can run through everything.

But this is our collective reality— there is no magic star, and grinding every day, without taking those conscious breaks is mentally grueling. Maybe you typically take a couple days off in the spring for a vacation…

…and maybe you didn’t this year because you’d rather “save it” for when we can do things and go places.

…maybe you didn’t take it because you wanted to keep some normalcy or a routine.

…maybe you didn’t take the time because you’re worried about your job; the fear around layoffs and furloughs are real.

Here’s the thing though— you can’t work yourself into the ground OR out of our current Covid reality. You have to take a break.

You have to take a brain break.

Do you know what happens to muscles you never relax? They don’t get stronger— in fact, your body adapts in a way to compensate for the fact you’re not resting and something else will be compromised (thank you, physical therapist friends)

Work MAY keep you busy and occupied, but like all trauma (I classify this whole experience as trauma, BTW), at some point— you need to process it.

In the event of layoff/ furlough, the emotional processing becomes exponentially important— because it’s hard to do start your next professional chapter if you haven’t resolved the prior one.

In my career, I’ve interviewed many people who have been affected by job loss, in different economic cycles (post 9-11, financial crisis, divestitures) and across various industries (media, financial services, real estate).

I can always tell the candidates who have made “peace” with their job loss— they typically interview well; are confident and are successful.

Conversely, I’ve interviewed those who had not or did not take the time and/ or steps to understand what they just went through — and it always shows up during the conversation.

The energy is different. The words feel heavier.

There is a bitterness.

And that intangible feeling of , “do I want to work with this person every day??

It’s not there.

Everyone processes things in different ways and at varying speeds, but I do know one thing for sure— you will be more resilient and have better perspective if you will have practiced some semblance of balance along the way.

When people ask me, “What do I do if I’ve been laid off?”

My answer? Take a little time*. Get right with yourself, formulate your your plan, and execute it.

*NB: I know that sounds a lot easier than it is.

When people ask me, “how do you know when you’re ready to start looking? Is there a sign?”

My answer — yes, and it honestly looks and feels a little bit like dating. Sometimes you break up with someone, sometimes you get your heart broken— either way, there comes a day where you know you’ve let it go and you’re ready to move forward.

Finally, if you are offered any assistance in the form of outplacement services… USE IT.

Outplacement is a benefit that many companies are cutting back on for cost purposes, if they offer it at all. But if you can access outplacement services as a part of your job loss— make the call. Log onto that webinar.

You don’t have to go right away, but MAKE THE CALL as soon as you think you can.

Why???

Even if you think it is dumb and you think the services aren’t effective — you are taking an action. You are taking the first step forward—maybe the hardest and important step in the process.

To acknowledge that you’re open to help; it is a brave and courageous step.

And that is to be celebrated.

THAT is productivity.

You’re ready to start dating.

Be well & stay well,

Jean

Music & Meals

I have to be honest; I was not going to write today.

BECAUSE THE FUNK IS REAL.

School in Illinois was cancelled the rest of the year and I was hearing stories on how difficult it was for small businesses to secure PPP funds, if they were able to at all.

I don’t think there is any business owner, big or small, that WANTS to take money; they’d rather be open, hustling, and serving their customers. But they have to SURVIVE.

Then I heard on the news today— the average restaurant has enough cash to remain viable for ~16 days. The margins are so thin.

I froze.

We’ve been shut down for more than 33. Maybe more. #lostcount

I worked in Corporate America for nearly 20 years. By contrast, my father has been an entrepreneur his whole life.

He owns a restaurant in the suburbs, D&J Bistro, in Lake Zurich, Illinois. Here he is in action.

My Dad.

He has been open for 32 YEARS.

His place has outlasted pretty much everyone, through disasters, crisis, even through the Cubs World Series Championship year when no one was going out to eat at a French bistro!

My parents are immigrants to this country. They came to Chicago from Japan more than four decades ago, as the story goes, just for a little trip— and then they stayed.

I can’t imagine life in the early days was easy. They had to learn English. I never really saw credit cards growing up; everything was paid for by cash. Only what we could afford. My dad worked crazy hours— because that’s what the industry demands.

My mom stayed at home and shouldered the majority of the parenting for me and brother. I always say it’s a damn miracle that both of us went to college, post-grad, and are tax-paying, law-abiding citizens. As are my parents, who became naturalized citizens almost 20 years ago.

This is not a political post. But I did come to a realization today. (Probably a little late to the punch, but better late than never)

The Government cannot save everyone. There are many businesses, big and small, that will not make it. If we rely on funds or programs to help our friends and businesses out— they will not make it.

When everything was shut down— like every other small business owner, my dad and his business partner had HOURS to make a decision.

• Do they close?

• Try carry out/ delivery?

• Would people order?

• French food— while delicious— is not really known as carry out fare.

They made to call to give it a go.

Let me make this clear— I never wanted to be in the restaurant industry. It’s a really hard life. It’s hard on families, because when everyone else is celebrating— you are in a kitchen. I kind of resented it, to be honest. But as I grew older— of course, I started to understand the sacrifice, the hours, the drive.

But the restaurant has been part of the foundation that has made me who I am today, even if I didn’t work there. It’s paid for my education, it put food on our table, clothes on our backs. Essentially, the American Dream.

D&J had a website, but it was static and couldn’t take online payments. Since I had been tinkering around with my own business website— we got a new one up within a day in order to take online payments.

“Gift Cards, Dad, people will buy gift cards!” I told him.

I’ve been *busting* into suburban mom Facebook groups to spread the word via social media. I share so many posts with my own FB friends that I am sure everyone is getting sick of it— but if people are selling makeup, oils, supplements— well, then I figure I can too. The support has been incredible.

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I am going to digress a little- stay with me.

My youngest daughter takes a toddler music class. Her teacher’s name is Ann Torralba, and she is known as Little Miss Ann!

Little Miss Ann

She’s really awesome— a former CPS teacher, mom, a full time musician— and she not only teaches at the Old Town School of Music (a Chicagoland mainstay), but plays gigs all over the place…even Lollapalooza and SXSW. She’s on Spotify!

I mean, if I was on Spotify, the whole world would know about it.

Since the shutdown, Ann has turned to FB and Instagram to host virtual concerts. They are everyday at 10am and she alternates the platforms. Musicians, performers— we know they are hurting too. No more concerts, at least not for now. And no more classes.

Her virtual concerts are free, but she takes donations, and we tune in at least 3-4 times a week to jam. My littlest rocks out and dances up a storm.

Another friend was hosting a virtual concert with a popular kids musician— so I thought.. hey— no reason why we couldn’t do the same? So we set it up for Sunday (4/19/2020)— a little pre-Earth Day Jam for the kids.

Just a $10 donation, and we thought it would be so cool to have a little show with all of our friends and family on, right?

Back to my dad …

D&J decided to join forces with a local hospital, Advocate Good Shepherd— for their “Meals for Heroes” program. People could “donate” a meal for the frontliners— and his team would prepare and take all of the donated meals over.

We put up the link last Friday.

TODAY, his team took 300 meals to the hospital.

During an April snowstorm.

Pick UP!

Getting ready!

Wouldn’t you be BEYOND HAPPY to eat that after your shift?

The even better news is that they’re doing it again next Friday— and already have donations for 150+ and counting.

SO WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH ANN? Keep Reading.

Today, Ann reached out to me and said she wanted to donate half of her proceeds from Sunday’s virtual jam to my dad’s program.

Talk about paying it forward. And I realized— all we can do to help these small businesses and our friends, is we need to help OURSELVES. We need to take it into our own hands to get it done.

I am not an award-winning musician, nor am I an award-winning chef.

What am I good at? Powerpoint. Storytelling. 18 years in Corporate America and 2 years as a journalist, remember?

So I decided to write this blog and create this powerpoint graphic— just look at the chain of goodness that results from one act.

Look at how far than $10 donation takes us.

If you have money— this is how you can amplify it!

If you don’t have money— you can write a kind note of encouragement. You can write a Yelp review. You can “share” a post on Facebook and spread the word. You can put up signs in your windows and sing for the frontliners. You can say, “thank you.”

So today was my realization that while everyday might not feel productive— we can, and SHOULD all contribute.

Do it your own way. You do you.

My deepest gratitude to everyone who has reached out and donated. Not enough words for me to express what is in my heart.

Be well, stay well,

Jean

Are You Ready? Yes? Then tell me who’s on your team.

You’ve probably heard of a concept called the “personal board of directors”. PBOD for short.

It has been around for awhile and even if you haven’t given it formal think time, you probably have your PBOD and use them already.

But given that we’re in some times, it’s probably worth reassessing— it’s a new day, and you should know who is on your Corona Contingency Council.

Corporate Board of Directors refresh members all the time, adding capability and perspective where they need guidance— and upgrading where it’s not enough. They count on Boards to keep them honest. There is no doubt that some organizations have better BOD’s than others. Quality matters.

So in no particular order, here are some of the folks I have in my circle.

The Sage … they have experiences upon experiences. They’ve LIVED with the decisions they’ve made and learned some tough lessons— Lessons that they will share with you, and that you will benefit from. Part storyteller, part magic 8 ball— they’ll give you the real deal.

The Ass Kicker … they are the ones who will not let you off the hook and make excuses. They know how to pivot, think on their feet and they will do the same for you. When you say, “I don’t think that will work because of XYZ”— they will give you an alternative and make you rethink it why you’re not stepping up. They evaluate and make decisions.

They are the person who is not afraid to say, “I won’t”, but you’ll never hear, “I can’t.” Because they CAN.

The Guru … they may not KNOW the answers to everything, but they help you ASK YOURSELF the right questions so you uncover the answers. They don’t have the precise directions, but they’ll help you uncover the road map! The path to enlightenment— if you will!

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The Cheerleader … for me, this is my best girlfriend who will tell me how pretty I look, even if I just tried to give myself some DIY highlights which resulted in orange hair. They are unending in their support and love. They make you feel great and tell you you’re doing to crush it ALL THE TIME.

(Even when your hair is orange.)

The One Who Knows Stuff You Don’t (but don’t feel dumb asking) … this person is a safe space. It’s the person who is potentially the exact opposite of who you are and what you know, but you can ask then ANYTHING and they will explain patiently will never poke fun. The beauty about this relationship? It’s highly likely that you return the favor for them!

E.g. My nemesis is math. Literally, I am not good with numbers. Do I have a phone-a-friend when it comes to understanding a financial statement or an accounting principle? You bet I do.

I used to love Columbo.

The Expert … they are steeped in domain. They know how things work— not at a 10,000 ft level, but zoomed ALL THE WAY IN. They understand the tiniest details that seem relatively insignificant to the lay person, and they know ALL the show stoppers.

They may even annoy you at times because you just want to go-go-go, but they’ll save you because they look at the fine print.

The One Who Talks You Off the Ledge … they are one of the lines of defense to preserve your mental health & sanity. When you are frustrated, they let you vent. When you are sad, they listen with empathy. They hold your hand (virtually, in a socially distant way). They make you feel heard. And when you need help, they will encourage you to see out the professionals.

The One Who Makes You Laugh … this is the one that reminds you not to take yourself so seriously. It’s not brain surgery. (unless it is) … then they are the one who puts things in the proper perspective and context. And they will do it in a way that doesn’t minimize the situation— just helps remind you in their own way, that “this too shall pass".

If you don’t have someone who’d text you this below….well, you just need them in your life.

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Things are going to be different when we get back to the “new normal”. Your business will change, your team dynamics will have shifted, your job may be different.

YOU may be different. You might be already.

So make sure that your Board is at the ready. You never know when you’re going to call on them.

Be well, stay well!

Jean

#sorrynotsorry. The Case for Thank You.

A couple of years ago, this BBC news clip went viral. I watched it on a loop and remember my stomach hurting from laughing hysterically.

I remember commiserating with my workmates, and seriously wishing I could walking into every meeting like THAT kid.

Dad was a real pro— remained relatively calm as he politely gave his kid a Heisman in the face.

Mom came RACING in frantically …. nearly faceplanting while trying to get a hold of the flying saucer (aka baby) and her oldest who was marching like she was leading the Rose Parade.

And considering the interview topic (North Korea!) the timing wasn’t great. (live TV is generally not great timing)

But isn’t that what made it all so … REAL and hilarious?

Last week, my husband, who’s been working from the basement office since his voice carries, texted us that the footsteps upstairs were LOUD.

He had an important meeting with senior leaders and I’m sure it was difficult to concentrate. But honestly, I was not feeling too sympathetic— because isn’t that EVERYONE right now???

Many of us struggle to maintain our sanity on any given “normal” day— During Covid— just maintaining is utterly exhausting.

During Covid, our daily checklist looks like this (at least mine does):

• Stay healthy

• Stay indoors

• Get fresh air, but don’t get near anyone

• Eat healthy

• But don’t go to the grocery store often

• Take vitamins

• Drink wine

• But too much wine will disrupt your sleep

• Sleep is important to health

• Scour the internet for TP, hand sanitizer and wipes

• Join every Facebook group and follow every # to get real time alerts on which Target has TP in stock

• Cook healthy meals for you and / or your family every day

• Prepare all homeschool lessons a day in advance

• Manage 2nd grade social calendar and ensure Zoom meetings aren’t hacked by creepers.

You know what I’m saying. It’s just A LOT to manage.

So back to our expert guy— he gets interrupted and he apologizes PROFUSELY. Last week, I got interrupted by my daughter last week and I apologized profusely. It’s definitely a “normal” response.

But you know what? None of this is normal— so here’s a thought.

Replace “sorry”… with “thank you”.

Thanks for your patience!

Thanks for saying hi to my kid!

Thanks for letting me see your dog!

Thanks for hanging in there with me!

Give yourself and those you work with the space and compassion to be a human being. Now is not the time to assess someone’s “executive presence”.

If we can give the permission to ourselves to be a little less perfect, we can do the same for others and be stronger after all of this is in the rear view mirror.

In the words of the Queen:

"We will succeed - and that success will belong to every one of us.”

Damn. She’s good.

And so are you.

Jean

PS: Link below to the clip. You have to.

https://youtu.be/Mh4f9AYRCZY

Today... was a good day.

I was talking to a dear friend earlier this week, and she said, “Jean, when I read your blogs, it’s like you’re talking to me.” So Erin Ellis, this one’s for you!

As tough as Tuesday was, Thursday was a winner.

I was grateful today for a sunny day, an engaging work call, and my 8-year-old doing schoolwork (at least the minimum amount)

But what really lifted my spirits was being able to help two of my friends who are on the front lines of CV19. One friend from HS put on her Instagram that her neurosurgeon husband needed some masks to wear over his PPE. Another friend of mine, who is a gastroenteroligist, needed the same.

Enter my sister in law, Kristin. She has a great heart, is super creative and is such a good human. I really love her. This is us last year in Japan visiting our family…it’s an awesome pic isn’t it? #alltheblossoms

So— Kristin can SEW! Last week, she offered to make masks, and I told her I’d take some for my healthcare friends. They may look simple, but they are not easy to make, the cutting, the pleating, then the sewing. Let me tell you, the ones she are making are double layered, and really durable. (If you are impressed with her mask pleating… you should see her gyoza she makes!)

I wanted to help— so I volunteered to cut masks so she could concentrate on sewing. I didn’t have fabric, but I did have the blackout curtains I just replaced in our bedroom— so I started cutting 9x6 rectangles. Each mask she makes uses two rectangles, and the curtains were actually perfect because they are double layered.

(Thank you for your service, West Elm curtains!)

Once I started cutting, I had a couple of revelations…

1) This is why my new drapes cost so much. Cutting fabric straight is basically like walking a tightrope. Impossible.

2) This is why I’m an HR person and not an atelier.

Because the docs were on call and working this weekend, we wanted to get some to them today. I drove down to my SIL’s apt, picked up the 5 masks she made; dropped off my fabric and delivered them to my friends… first stop — the Alberts. This is my close friend, Rachel— and her husband is Dr. Andrew Albert.

Next stop…The Boyers…and here is Dr. Jerrel Boyer modeling his new gear.

Two doctors. Two families. 5 masks.

It didn’t seem like so much, but they were so grateful— they have been so concerned for their patients, their own families, our city. They are in my thoughts and prayers always. These are moments I will always remember.

As soon as I got home— Kristin texted me…the needle on her sewing machine broke… GAH!!! No replacement until Saturday.

Facebook groups to the rescue!!! I put out an SOS to my neighborhood FB group— within 5 minutes I had responses. I picked them up, dropped them back off at her apartment. #handoff

BOOM! Back in business!

So Kiki (that’s what I call her) is going to keep sewing, and I’m going to keep cutting masks in the evenings. It is not a high powered operation, but it is making a difference for at least two families. And that is enough for us.

I am also “paying” her in cookies. Again, I can’t sew. But I can cut, drive, and bake really good Potbelly copycat cookies.

And if you need HR solutions, career coaching or advice, that’s my day job.

Be well, stay well—

Jean